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“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony”: Mahatma Gandhi
India
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New Delhi, June 02, 2021 :
What is happiness ? This question has been an elusive one from the time immemorial . Greek philosopher Plato said that “the happiness or well being , Eudaimonia, is the highest aim of moral thought and virtues are the requisite skills and dispositions to attain it” .
Without getting into the rut of definitions one can conclusively say that ‘ it’s a state of mind ‘ . When a child plays with a pebble or clay , he feels happy . Someone may feel happy by seeing a picture , nature’s beauty and host of other things . There are no fixed rules to become happy. However , the cause of happiness is identifiable . At various stages of life , it may vary according to the need and requirements of life .
A person , is always found to be in the pursuit of happiness, the sole purpose of human existence , as Aristotle puts it . Here, one encounters a situation , a situation where the aspirations have been met, yet the person is not happy. The state of happiness looses its course and the person is drawn into the state of anxiety or boredom.
At this stage of life , it is very important to identify the cause of happiness and unhappiness as well . Being honest to oneself is the first thing which one can do. In the constant state of denial , one cannot identify the root cause of what makes you either of the one. If someone is happy with a particular food , cloth , automobile , ornament etc. he or she may acquire it .
At the same time there are many intangible reasons which makes a person happy or unhappy. The vicious circle of volatility vagueness and ambiguity makes a person vulnerable and susceptible to unhappiness. This circle is formed in the thought process of the person only. That is why it has been often repeated that happiness depends on ourselves only and no one else.
Amongst the main reasons of unhappiness are failures to achieve any goal either in the career , family or a relationship.
- Uncertainty is the another reason of unhappiness , whether its in family life , career , profession or a relationship .
- Lack of flexibility in approach towards anything also is a cause of concern which begets unhappiness.
- Rigid and stubborn approach creates a gap between hopes and despairs , between expectations and fulfillments and demand and supply . It may be quantitative or qualitative.
- Comparison with others , as Jean Jacques Rousseau , a modern social scientist rightly said that , the principal source of human unhappiness was our tendency to make invidious comparisons in the present day modern civil society , whereas , cooperation was the cardinal principal in the state of nature.
- Relative positions or status , either amongst the family members , kins , peers or the society is a major cause of unhappiness.
- It creates severe heart burn and jealousy , if not handled in a positive way .
- Breach of trust can cause severe mental and emotional agony in a person.
- Loss of life or property are the tangible reasons of unhappiness but it is clearly identifiable . Here passage of time is the only healer , nothing else .
Therefore , happiness can be achieved by becoming brutally honest to oneself and by sharing it with anyone, where one can repose his or her trust beyond doubt.
Communication , is the key of sharing thoughts and emotions . A closed heart and mouth can create an emotional turbulence and mental instability .
Midlife crisis can lead a person to the state of saturation. Despite having all material comforts of life one can always feel deprived of the peace and tranquility , if a person is going through this phase of crisis. This crisis has its origin in self neglect and family fabric. The anxiety related to grown up children’s future mimics again in a person’s life as it happened with himself , years ago .
Moreover , deteriorating physical and at times mental health , leads to this kind of crisis. Conflict in the family works as a catalyst to accelarate this crisis.
Societies , due to their inherent culture , customs and traditions have witnessed variations in their happiness goals . Stronger social norms sometimes also leads to unhappiness as the fear of sanction always looms large over the mind and the soul.
It’s a fact that human being is a bundle of wide ranging emotions , from happiness to sorrow and one cannot remain constantly in one state or other . The fragile nature of the humanity is also its core identity . Nevertheless , the sense of gratitude and acceptance are the path leading to satisfaction which in turn produces happiness.
The sheer dynamism in the ever changing scenario of the human life , defines its purpose .
Therefore , every individual can have his or her own macro and micro level goals , at various stages of life , to ripe the fruit of peace and happiness without causing any form of unhappiness to others . A verse from Brihadaranayk Upnishad would always remain relevant “Sarve bhavantu sukhinah , sarve santu niramaya” .
Author: Ravi P. Chaturvedi , IRTS ( Views are personal)
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